Media in the New Millennium

posted by Doyle

Is the headline obvious? It should be, and we’d all like to think so, but I’ve been struck recently by some really — yes, I’ll say it — stupid marketing efforts. A couple of favorites:

• I really like this Old Spice liquid soap that I use, but the label says “3X Clean Guaranteed!” I’m sorry, but WTH is “3X” clean? I’ve been so tempted to demand a refund because I’m “just not feeling the 3X. 2X, maybe, but definitely not 3X.” Wonder what they would say? And, how is 3X clean measured? Were animals used to test this and, if so, which animals? Are the results applicable to humans?  Just wondering.
• There’s a television ad for some anti-depression drug that urges me to “alert my doctor if I have increased thoughts of suicide.” What?! I thought this was an ANTI-depression drug. I understand the legal requirements for disclaimers (my favorite side-effect recently was “oily discharge.” Eww. Think I’ll stick to whatever I have that the drug will cure in that case…) but I would say it’s pretty stupid to go direct to a consumer with a drug that may lead to thoughts of suicide in some patients? Sounds like a doctor should be making that decision from start to finish. The whole things seems a little shaky to me.
• Not to pick on liquid soap all day, but I noticed one that was scented “arctic blast.” Never having been to the North Pole, I’m not sure what that might smell like. At least it’s better than Coors Brewing Company’s ill-fated “Artic Ice” beer — the “c” was left out of “arctic” because brand management felt most consumers didn’t know the correct spelling and would think the correct spelling would look funny. True story.

I could go on, but you get the idea. In the end, one of the things I like most about social media is the conversational nature. Good, crisp, clean, informative writing will get attention — marketing drivel will get, at best, ignored. Better yet, nonsense will get called out and ridiculed for the nonsense it is.

Got a favorite piece of stupid marketing? Send it along!

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